Painting With Beautiful Light

“My husband painted that.” Annie told me with a girlish giggle that denied her 70 years. Turning to look behind me, I saw a large painting gracing the wall across from her bed. It was a portrait of Annie in a faded blue house dress and a radiant smile. Annie is not a classically beautiful woman, and none of her faults are omitted in the painting yet, in this picture, she is one of the loveliest women I have ever seen. Suddenly, I am fascinated.

I went back many days to consider the mystery of Annie’s painting until I understood. When a person looks at that portrait, they see her the way that her husband saw her- beautiful. Every flaw is painted in, from the veins on her hands to the way that little lines play around her mouth and neck, but we see only how lovely she is. Because he loved her, he painted her in a beautiful light and now there is no doubt in the mind of anyone who sees her that she is indeed a beautiful lady.

I decided then that this was how I wanted to be loved. Love that sees me just as I am, yet uses a beautiful light to “paint my picture.” I want the man who loves me to believe what he is painting so much that everyone else sees it, too. In spite of the flaws and mistakes and even the sins, I’d like at least him to use that lovely indescribable light to portray me.

Then I considered some of my own artistic triumphs. I haven’t always pained others in a favorable light before others. I’ve let anger magnify faults and disappointment color people in ugly shades. I’ve let misplaced humor portray others as ridiculous. I’m ashamed of some of the portraits I have made and even more ashamed that I have put some of them on display. Especially, I am ashamed, when I consider what light has been shed over me by the grace of God. “All glorious within” has He called me? Certainly, I am not. Yet, the Savior says that it is so and paints me in shades mixed with grace and His own righteousness.

I think that it must take a lot of work to paint a portrait like Annie’s. Years of practicing forgiveness and patience. Lots of lessons in preferring others above ones self. Studying one’s subject until it is understood and then studying some more. One day, I hope to leave behind me better pictures. They will be the kind of pictures that make others see the best in their subjects. I can’t erase her flaws, but I can focus on what a sweet spirit she always practiced. I can’t change his past, but I can show others how insignificant it is compared to the magnificent things God did with his life. Doesn’t love cover a multitude of sins? I think if I keep practicing, soon I will access that light naturally and use it easily. And something is whispering to me that it isn’t too late to dust off some of my old portraits and restore them with love instead of ill-feeling as a light to see by.

I am determined to clean my brushes and mix up better colors. You may join me if you would like.